I am in shitty physical shape

Striking myself in the face with the truth hammer yet again

Layering onto my realization that I am not athletic is the fact that I am in pretty shitty physical shape right now. I’ve never been an Adonis but for a little bit, I was at least taking care of myself. Not being athletic compounding it with not being in shape (a combination of not eating right and not working out) just creates bigger blockers to my ultimate goal.

When the pandemic first hit, I ordered an under-the-desk treadmill knowing that I wasn’t going to have access to my gym for a little bit. Whenever I had a conference call or a zoom meeting I would hop on the treadmill which was awesome until basically 5-7 hours a day just became zoom meetings, then it became a little untenable. Let’s be honest it was all to avoid actually going outside to run, because who wants that?

I dropped 14 pounds quickly by doing a little bit of exercise and eating right, I was feeling good. Having just filed for divorce a few weeks before everything hit, I thought, “hey if I eat right, work out while I am at work… when this is over in a few months I am going to be coming out ahead. Divorced, in shape, and feeling great.”

Yeah, I might have been a tad wrong on the timeline and the results.

As summer went on and the pandemic and my divorce lagged the under the desk treadmill became a footrest. My diet became a combination of eating the ever-living shit out of my feelings and eating things that made me feel good. “Oh, a burrito stuffed with french fries and queso? That sounds like an outstanding lunch!”

If you look at my food pyramid it was basically:
-Chicken Parm

-Biscuits and Gravy

-Every conceivable different style of cheeseburgers

-A salad to make me feel like I was making good choices

-Cinnamon rolls

2020 piled on: pandemic, wildfires, snowstorm, divorce, death of my father, losing clients at work because of the pandemic, the discovery that my child might be on the autism spectrum all while sleeping in the basement on an inflatable air mattress.

Not to get dark but it was a year and it kind of sucked any motivation out of me.

2021 rolled around and it was much of the same until March when my divorce became final, and I moved into a new place with a gym literally 20 feet from my back door. However, none of my habits changed, well except sleeping in a bed and not dreading walking into the door of my home every day. I am going to chalk this up to me getting back to being me and probably being lazy as hell.

Now with 2021 coming to an end this all needs to change, not just to reach my goals on the golf course but to feel better about myself and be better to myself. This I feel is the easiest change I can make when I create my plan forward.